This is John Philip Sousa’s comic operetta The Wolf, transcribed and edited by Arthur O’Dwyer (2025).

The text is taken from a typescript whose original (with penciled additions presumably by Sousa) is in the Library of Congress's Sousa collection (ML31.S68 box 32 folder 4), although I used a photocopy from the Paul Bierley papers in the Sousa Archives at UIUC (box 79 folder 5), which additionally contains blue-pen notes by Bierley. Some manuscript lyric fragments, with score, are found in ML31.S68 box 32 folder 5; these include “I’m a Photographer” (song, Binks), ”The Duchess comes / When hearts want other hearts” (Binks and Loba), and fragments of “I ask your most profound attention” (Wolf) and “If I’m forced to wed you” (Mariquita and Lombriz).

Many small corrections, especially to punctuation, have been made quietly. Larger corrections, issues, and notes are marked in the text like this, with further details in the mouseover text.

The typographical presentation is inspired by Asimov’s Annotated Gilbert & Sullivan (1988).

See also The Wolf’s entry in Paul E. Bierley’s The Works of John Philip Sousa (1984).

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The Wolf

Words and music by John Philip Sousa

(Written circa 1888; never produced)

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Dramatis Personæ

Gabriel, who loves Mariquita
Lombriz, a miser
Balthazar, proprietor of the “Golden Donkey”
Binks, in the arts
Gandul, a gentleman of liberal ideas
Sapo, his very particular friend
Captain San Giorgio, of the household troops
Argalles, the Notary, a disinterested party
Saraste, the Jailer, emotional but staunch
Mariquita, unfortunately born a girl
La Loba, the Wolf
Villette, Mariquita’s maid
Chorus of Villagers, Robbers, Gypsy Girls, and Carabineers

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Act I

Scene.—A Spanish village in the Pyrenees. Villa of Mariquita R. with trellised veranda. A public inn, the “Golden Donkey,” L. At back a stone fence with gate in center; streets. As curtain rises, groups of villagers are discovered making floral letters, forming the words “Mariquita weds this day,” which they place on the side of the trellis.

[Enter Villette.]

[Enter Gandul with a pedlar’s tray.]

[During Gandul’s recitative, Sapo has entered quietly and mingled with the villagers. He wears a faded, dilapidated velvet coat, much worn and soiled. One tail is missing, and the other trails on the ground.]

[Sapo takes off the coat with great care, allowing no one to assist him, and hands it reverently to Gandul.]

[Gandul mounts box, places basin of water and soap on tray, and immerses trick-coat.]

[Gandul pulls out the coat, which is now greatly shrunken.]

[Sapo grabs coat and rushes down, gazing at it mournfully. Chorus follows him.]

[They fight.]

[At the end of the first bout, Gandul appears to have received the worst of the encounter; he looks piqued.]

[They fight.]

[At end of chorus, Sapo drops as if wounded.]

[Gandul pockets the money quickly. Sapo jumps up nimbly. They join arms and skip off. The rest look puzzled.]

[Exeunt hurriedly, U. E. L. As they go off, enter the Notary; he engages in conversation with Villette.]

Vil. Are you sure you are not mistaken?

Not. Not in the least. I read the will to-day, for the four hundred and eleventh time, searching for the inevitable flaw. I found it.

Vil. The flaw?

Not. The inevitable flaw.

Vil. It wasn’t in the sealing, was it?

Not. The will explicitly says that Donna Mariquita must be wed to Lombriz—you understand, must be wed to Lombriz—before her eighteenth year. There is no provision for any subsequent period.

Vil. There is no need of any, as Lombriz has named to-night for the wedding.

Not. But if he should fail to appear—?

Vil. What, you don’t mean cold poison!

Not. Nonsense. Suppose some trusted friend of Mariquita’s should conclude that a change of air would be beneficial to Lombriz.

Vil. In other words, kidnap him.

Not. I would call it a surprise party.

Vil. A masquerade would sound better.

Not. And make it so pleasant for him that he couldn’t tear himself away.

Vil. Well, it wouldn’t work.

Not. Why not?

Vil. Do you imagine Lombriz would submit to such a trick without showing up the culprits?

Not. That’s it exactly.

Vil. I don’t understand.

Not. Briefly, then, he returns. Donna Mariquita in the mean time has married. Lombriz is furious. He invokes the power of the law—

Vil. And sues for the estate.

Not. Donna Mariquita appoints me her attorney—

Vil. In which case we lose.

Not. Exactly. I appeal to a higher court—

Vil. And we lose again.

Not. Yes, but only after a long fight and many postponements.

Vil. And then?

Not. I appeal to the Supreme Court.

Vil. What of that?

Not. What of that? Why, before it reaches trial, Donna Mariquita will be a grandmother, and Lombriz will be tucked away under the daisies.

Vil. But who will have the fortune?

Not. Well, that depends; but I feel confident Lombriz won’t.

Vil. I’ll tell Donna Mariquita of your plan; maybe she’ll adopt it, as she is almost distracted at the thought that she may be forced to marry that miserable old miser.

Not. Say to her I suggested it out of pure disinterested friendship.

Vil. No doubt she’ll appreciate it.

Not. And say when she sends over a check in the morning to be sure and write the figures plainly. The banks are so particular.

Vil. Now I know it is disinterested friendship with a string to it.

Not. Remember, I enjoin absolute secrecy.

Vil. I’ll run and tell Mariquita and the rest of the girls. It will be awfully jolly.

[Exit Villette into house. Enter Gabriel.]

Gab. Who more unhappy than I?

Mar. But one: I alone.

Gab. And to think that to-day you are to marry another—!

Mar. And such another!

Gab. Ugly!—

Mar. Hateful!—

Gab. Miserly!—

Mar. And in his dotage. [Suddenly] But I won’t marry him!

Gab. Bravely said, my angel. [Embraces her]

Mar. That is—if I can avoid it.

Gab. We must, my darling. [Embraces again]

[Enter Lombriz U. E. L.]

Lom. Nice situation for a young woman about to be married.

Mar. That depends upon whom she is to marry.

Gab. You don’t expect her to hug you, do you, you bunch of bones without a soul?

Lom. Why not?

Mar. He says “why not,” and every house in town has a mirror.

Lom. Well, I object to any further sentimental nonsense between you.

Mar. I don’t.

Gab. We don’t. [Embraces her]

Lom. But I do, so get right out!

Gab. And leave my darling? Never!

Mar. Never!

Gab. There is nothing in her father’s will prohibiting her from loving me, even if it did say she must marry you.

Lom. If you love him so much, why don’t you marry him?

Mar. And lose my fortune? Never! I’ll marry you; then, when I have conveniently become a happy widow, Gabriel shall have me for his bride.

Gab. Yes, but darling, every fellow don’t fancy warmed-over affections, you know.

Mar. [aside] Don’t fear; the fight isn’t over yet. [Aloud] Don Lombriz, I am too intensely practical to marry for love alone.

[Mariquita dances off with Gabriel. Lombriz hobbles off after them.

[Enter hurriedly La Loba, Gandul, and Sapo, E. U. R.]

Loba Has anything of importance occurred?

Sapo Everything is exceedingly dull.

Gan. If business don’t improve, I’ll be forced to turn honest.

Sapo I wouldn’t blame you, Gandul; times are hard.

Loba Are there no travelers about to cross the mountains?

Sapo Every inn in town is empty.

Loba Bad, very bad. I sadly fear I’ll have to marry.

Gan. Why, it’s only six months since our late captain went a story higher.

Sapo Most likely a story lower.

Loba That makes no difference; a lonely heart needs a strong arm upon which to lean.

Gan. What’s the matter with taking me?

Sapo Or me?

Gan. Or both of us?

Loba No, I shall probably go outside the band.

Gan. Then what’s the use of this civil-service racket you have inaugurated in the organization, if the very best place is to go to an outsider?

Loba Remember, in a matter that concerns me, I am above civil-service rules; they were made for you hirelings. We of royal blood do not recognize them.

Sapo Then you intend going outside the party?

Loba I shall consult the cards; on their decision rest your hopes and my future. [Calling] Balthazar! Balthazar!

[Enter Balthazar.]

Balt. Coming, Signorita, coming. Ah, the Wolf! Yours to command.

Loba Do you expect any guests to-day?

Balt. Yes, I am informed a rich and distinguished traveler will stop here on his way across the mountains.

Loba Good. We will rest and wait for him. The funds are getting low; something must be done to replenish. What we robbers most need is a large surplus in the treasury.

[Exeunt omnes into the inn.

[Enter Chorus, carrying various articles such as hat-boxes, canes, umbrellas: the property of Binks. During the following chorus, enter Binks astride a donkey, umbrella over head; camera and photographer’s outfit strapped on two pack-donkeys.]

Binks Are the gent as keeps this blooming hotel?

Balt. Yes, Your Excellency.

Binks Then have these very ignoble animals fed and watered.

Balt. Here, Antonio, water this stock.

[The donkeys are led off. The chorus still hold on to luggage.]

Binks As the whole blooming population turned out to meet me, what’s the correct thing to do?

Balt. A mere trifle will satisfy them, Your Excellency, and make them as happy as little romping cherubs.

Binks Just what degree of felicity the aforementioned cherubs enjoy, I don’t know, so I’ll give them a trifle to find out. Come here, little one.

[Jacinta approaches. Binks gives her a very small coin.]

Binks Share that among your friends; go off and have a good time; don’t be extravagant, but enjoy yourselves; and remember this:

[Exit Chorus, dropping luggage on the stage as they go. Balthazar picks it up.]

Binks Are your accommodations first-class?

Balt. A-one.

Binks Can I get a bed?

Balt. I have just one left.

Binks That’s plenty; I never occupy but one at a time. Good view?

Balt. Excellent. Looks out on the pig-sty, Your Excellency.

Binks [aside] The blooming idiot must think I’m from Chicago.

Balt. The musical murmuring of the animals is very soothing.

Binks Something like a hoganette, I presume.

Balt. [taking register] Your name, Your Excellency?

Binks S. Binks.

Balt. Is that all?

Binks That’s all I brought with me. I’m blooming hungry; can you furnish me a nice rabbit, smothered in onions, and a mug of bitter beer?

Balt. Certainly, Your Excellency. We raise our own rabbits—finest in the kingdom. Will you have it stuffed? [Goes toward door]

Binks No, I’ll do the stuffing.

[As Balthazar gets within the door, the cry of a cat is heard as if coming from the kitchen. Binks starts, then rings violently. Balthazar rushes out.]

Balt. What is it, Your Excellency?

Binks On second thought, I have concluded not to order rabbit.

Balt. My rabbits are very fresh, Your Excellency.

Binks Yes, I noticed that. Can you give me a fresh egg?

Balt. In all styles, Your Excellency. We lay our own eggs.

Binks What?

Balt. I mean, our hennery does.

Binks Henry who? —But however, order your blooming Henry to lay me a half dozen hard-boiled, with plenty of salt and pepper.

Balt. They shall be served immediately.

[Exit Balthazar.]

Binks Well, here I am, alone in this beastly onion-eating country, and all in the interest of Art. Oh, Art, thou art a tyrant! Says Mrs. Binks, says she, “Binksy my dear, you oughter travel. You are in the Arts; you must enlarge your views. Instead of confining yourself, metaphorically, to tin-type at sixty for a dollar, enlarge them to an eight-by-ten.” And as my personal views at home are like my photographic ones—always negative—I followed her advice, and here I am.

[La Loba heard singing within the hotel. Binks listens attentively.]

Binks What a barometer! It must register from zero.

[Binks rings violently. Balthazar enters slowly.]

Balt. Did Your Excellency ring for me?

Binks Did I ring for you? Oh no, I was only calling some friends of mine in San Francisco. What angel’s voice is that I just heard?

Balt. No angel, signor, but a duchess.

Binks Well, they are socially equal in this blooming country, ain’t they?

Balt. Hardly. The Spanish nobility are very select.

Binks You say she is a real flesh-and-blood duchess?

Balt. Certainly. All the nobility patronize my house.

Binks Of course. That’s why I’m here. Do you think I could get a peep at her?

[During the last few lines, Gandul appears cautiously at the upper window of the inn, listening.]

Gan. [aside] The fish bites. [Exits]

Balt. I hardly think so. She is very haughty, and would scarcely condescend to be seen by anyone below her in rank. Now, if you were in the nobility—

Binks Well, I never was directly, but my father was oyster-opener-in-waiting to the royal family; perhaps that will have some weight.

Balt. Perhaps. I’ll go and see. [Exits]

Binks A duchess—an imperial duchess! What an honor! What immense happiness! Just think how Smudge, Pickledidle, Pappletory, and the rest of ’em will feel when I tell them about it! [Dances and sings]

[Re-enter Balthazar.]

Balt. The duchess returns the compliment, and says she is always pleased to meet an English gentleman. She will be with us immediately. —Ah, she comes.

[Enter La Loba, richly dressed.]

Binks She’s a stunner. What liquid languor in her lily-like looks!

Balt. Your Excellency Duchess Mantilla Seguedilla Tantarilla Syruposquilla Takoyourfilla, allow me to present Signor Oyster-opener-in-waiting— [Whispers to Binks] Blinks?

Binks Binks. B–I–N–K–S.

Balt. [aloud] —Binks. B–I–N–K–S.

[Elaborate bowing. Balthazar quits. They finally sit down. Silence for a short period. Binks fidgets.]

Binks Allow me, Your Duchess, to offer my respectable respects. I hope Your Grace’s health is blooming.

Loba Yes, signor, there are times in our life when the blush of health surmounts the cheeks, while—

Binks The deeper blush is on the smeller, as it were.

Loba Smeller?

Binks Yes, smeller—proboscis, oil-factories. [Points to his nose.]

Loba [sighing] Ah, yes, I understand; but oh, signor, the cheek, the nose may blush, and laughter may be both on the lip and in the eye, but the heart— Ah, signor, have you a heart?

Binks Have I a heart—! Why, bless your blooming buttons, I couldn’t get insured if I hadn’t.

Loba Then you know what it is to suffer—what it is to be heart-weary.

Binks [drawing close] She’s a hummer! [Aloud and melancholy] I do.

Loba Ah, signor—! [Makes a motion as if she were coming closer, then looks coyly at Binks, who immediately draws his chair closer. He tries to take her hand, but can’t find it] Had I met such as you in the days that are gone, how happy I might have been!

Binks [aside] I’ve caught her dead, and Mrs. Binks is out of town. [He draws nearer. Puts his arm around her waist. Both sigh. She draws away. Same business. He places her head on his shoulder.] “Come, rest in this bosom, my own stricken deer.”

Loba [impassionately, but perfectly motionless] Ah, I must not— I— No, no, don’t tempt me.

Binks Listen, I’m a respectable single gentleman.

Loba Ah, yes! Pity me—I know not what I say.

Binks Of course I pity you. “Though the herd has flown from thee, thy home is still here.”

[Enter Gandul as supposed Duke. He enters with dignity and does not give way to any emotion.]

Loba [jumping up, apparently very much frightened] Oh no—my husband! He’ll kill us both! Spare us, spare us! [Falling on knees]

Binks Yes, spare us—at least spare me.

Gan. And it is thus you would rob me?

Binks I—

Gan. Enough! [To La Loba] To your room. [To Binks] Do you smoke? [Offers cigar-case to Binks, who takes the cigar with alacrity]

Binks With—

Gan. Enough! Have a light.

Binks With—

Gan. Enough! My friend will call on you within the hour; permit me to wish you a very good day.

[Exit Gandul, walking with dignity but at the same time gracious. Binks follows, but does not succeed in shaking hands with him.]

Binks A very good day—! It looks to me like a very bad day.

[Binks rings for Balthazar, who enters.]

Binks Why didn’t you tell me she was married?

Balt. Why, what’s the matter?

Binks Matter—! A most serious matter; she said she was heart-weary and wanted sympathy.

Balt. Did she get it?

Binks I regret to state that she did.

Balt. Oh, unfortunate man! He’s a terror. He has killed upwards of twenty men already. He’s a dead shot, and the finest swordsman in Spain.

Binks [starting off] If any telegrams come for me, direct them to No. 2, Strand, London.

Balt. As you value your life, don’t go. He killed a man two weeks ago yesterday— no, it was to-day— for attempting to get away. Don’t go.

Binks Oh, Lord, what will become of me?

Balt. Heaven only knows. If you have any instructions to leave as to the disposition of your property, I’ll see they are carried out.

Binks Thanks. That means I’ll be carried out. I say, can’t this thing be compromised?

Balt. It’s doubtful, but I’ll go in and talk to him and see what can be done.

[Exit Balthazar.]

Binks That Duke’s got a disreputable optic. No more Duchesses for me. Plain everyday people will have to do for Binks, Esquire—that is, if I escape this time.

[Re-enter Balthazar.]

Binks Well, did you fix him up?

Balt. I told him that those little attentions were customary among the nobility of your country, and finally persuaded him to overlook the insult to his honor.

Binks Good. You’re a blooming brick.

Balt. I also persuaded him to accept a small token a mark of your respect and esteem, which he will not allow to be larger than five hundred duros.

Binks Five hundred duros—!

Balt. Remember, it’s dirt cheap. He’s killed twenty men.

Binks Ah, yes, it’s a snap. [Takes out wallet, pays out money, takes memorandum book and writes] Mem. To sundry expenses. Piece of the stopper from Adam’s nursing-bottle, fifty duros; for three splinters from the cabin of Noah’s Ark, two hundred duros; for a well-preserved copy of David’s sling, two hundred and fifty duros. That’s for the eye of Mrs. Binks.

[While Binks soliloquizes, a waiter places eggs and refreshments on table. Binks sits down to eat.

[Enter La Loba dressed as a Spanish dancing girl: short dress, tambourine, etc.]

[As soon as La Loba begins to sing, Binks stops eating and watches her with increasing interest. At the refrain of the second verse, unable to remain quiet, he joins her in the dance; and at the last bar they strike an attitude, she with foot up, leaning on his shoulder, holding the tambourine coyly up to him.]

Loba Will the kind signor give the poor gypsy girl a trifle?

Binks You’re blooming right I will! [Aside] She is a dandy. What simplicity, what innocence! [Suddenly, holding her off] Are you married?

Loba Married? No, signor, I’m too young to be married.

Binks Of course you are, but you’ll get over that.

Loba I must be going, signor. [She attempts to break away. He holds her]

Binks Just one chaste salute before we say farewell.

Loba No, no, signor!

[She struggles faintly. Just as Binks is about to kiss her, Sapo comes on in a matador costume, rushes at Binks, throws him down, and draws a dagger.]

Sapo Caramba! Maleador!

Loba [rushing between them] Oh, spare him! Kill me, but spare him! By the memory of our betrothal, spare him!

Binks If you are a gentleman, you’ll oblige the lady. Besides, I have another engagement and can’t break it.

Sapo No—I will kill you. Prepare to feel the vengeance of Geofredo Zacarias Rodolfo Jenofonte Sigismundo!

Binks As this is the first vengeance I have been called upon to feel, I hope you will give me time to make the necessary preparations.

Sapo [rushing at him] No, now! [Binks retreats]

[Enter Balthazar.]

Balt. What’s this I see? Great Gonzalez save you, but you’re in a scrape!

Binks I know I am. Get me out and I will be your eternal friend.

Balt. I’ll try to help you, but this fellow is a worse terror than the other.

[Balthazar takes Sapo aside. Animated pantomime between Balthazar and Sapo.]

Binks [watching them] He’s telling him it’s all a mistake— that’s right. He won’t believe it— that’s wrong. He says I’ll apologize— that’s right. He won’t allow it— that’s wrong. He says five— probably means to welter in my gore within five minutes. Oh, what’s to become of my prospective widow and orphans?

Balt. [crossing to Binks] After much persuasion, I have convinced him that you thought she was your long-lost cousin.

Binks Good! Did he suspect?

Balt. Not in the least; he accepts the explanation.

Binks Shake! You are a born diplomat.

Balt. I also told him you were exceedingly anxious to give him some slight token of your respect and esteem.

Binks How much this time?

Balt. Suppose you make it five hundred.

Binks Don’t you think he’d compromise on four ninety-nine?

Balt. Sh! You are standing over a volcano.

Binks [producing wallet and counting money] If this continues, I’ll have to walk home. [Takes memorandum book] Mem. To sundries: For piece of the jaw-bone of the original ass, two hundred duros. For much-worn model of the missing link, three hundred duros. How Mrs. Binks will appreciate them.

[La Loba and Sapo go off arm in arm. As they are about to exit, La Loba turns to Binks and blows a kiss.]

Loba Good-bye, signor—sweet signor.

Binks Good-bye. [Very cheerfully, about to throw a kiss] —Check yourself, Binks, check yourself. It’s too damn expensive.

Balt. You are very fortunate to get off so easily. It’s a good thing I was present to explain matters.

Binks I won’t look at another woman while I’m in Spain. Come show me to my room. Lock me in and lose the combination.

[Exeunt Binks and Balthazar into the inn. The stage is clear.

[Enter Mariquita from house. She is dressed as a robber.]

Mar. I flatter myself I combine in this dress the ferocious aspect of both the traditional and modern cutthroat; I certainly look dangerous. I almost feel sorry for Lombriz; how he’ll tremble when I catch him. I wonder where the rest are? [Tries to whistle. Makes a failure of it. Calls] Girls! I say, girls!— Oh, I forgot!

[Enter Villette, Teresa, Ester, and Jacinta, dressed similarly to Mariquita.]

Vil. At your orders, Cap!

Mar. Do you feel brave?

All [timidly] Exceedingly.

Mar. Don’t feel frightened. I could face a lion.

Vil. [boldly] So could I!

Jac.   So could I.

Est.     So could I.

Ter.       So could I. [Each girl’s voice higher than the preceding one]

Vil. Oh dear, there come two men and a woman. I know I’ll faint.

Mar. Brace up, gentlemen. They’ve seen us. We must put on a bold front and make them believe we are brigands.

Vil. Yes, the very worst kind of brigands.

Jac.   The very worst kind of brigands!

Est.     The very worst kind of brigands!

Ter.       The very worst kind of brigands!

[Enter La Loba, Gandul, and Sapo, U. E. L.]

Mar. [waving pistol] Stand and—and deliver!

Loba [approaching Mariquita, who retreats] Who are you?

Mar. Do you not know me? I am the dreaded Baldystopper. Tremble!

[La Loba, Gandul, and Sapo laugh.]

Mar. Why don’t you tremble?

Vil. Please do.

Mar. Just for my sake.

Gan. Well, I’m always ready to oblige a la— er, a robber.

Mar. [aside to Girls] This don’t seem to work right. All accounts I’ve read differ.

Vil. Maybe you are not ferocious enough.

Gan. See here, young fellow, point that pistol another way; if it goes off, the top of your head will accompany it.

Mar. What—insult the dreaded Baldystopper? He who is recognized as the boss terror of the Pyrenees? Down on thy knees before I end thy craven life!

Gan. [suddenly] Why, I declare, there’s a mouse!

Mar. and Girls Where? [Screaming and jumping on tables and chairs]

Loba A truce to this farce. Why are you masquerading in man’s attire?

Mar. Because I don’t want to marry.

Sapo Most women masquerade because they do.

Loba Let me into your confidence. Perhaps I can help you.

Mar. Oh, if I could but trust you—!

Gan. As a rule we are opposed to trusts, but in this instance we waive our opposition. Proceed.

Mar. Know, then, to-night I shall be compelled to marry a man I hate.

Loba I did not know it is au fait for young ladies to promenade in such a dress for that reason.

Mar. No; my object is to kidnap my would-be husband.

Vil. And frustrate his designs on her heart and pocket-book.

Sapo You were going to kidnap him with these aides?

Girls Sir!

Loba You should feel thankful you met us.

Gan. This is no amateur racket.

Sapo You require professional help.

Gan. And it pleases me to state that we are in that line of business.

Mar. Why, what do you mean?

Loba That we are—

Gan. Robbers.

Girls [retreating] Oh!

Sapo Cutthroats.

Girls   Oh!

Loba Brigands.

Girls     Oh!

Gan. Knights of the road, and gentlemen, at your service.

Sapo We are opposed to centralization—

Gan. Unless we form the center.

Loba In fact, we do anything from picking a pocket to holding a lord for ransom.

Mar. Do you think it would be wicked to abduct him?

Gan. Why, bless you, I wouldn’t do it if it were; I teach the infant class in Sunday school.

Sapo And he couldn’t afford to set ’em a bad example. We’re tender-hearted gentlemen.

Mar. May I depend on you?

Loba You may, for a moneyed consideration.

Gan. Say, three thousand duros.

Mar. It’s a bargain.

[Dance and exeunt omnes.

[Enter Notary and Gabriel. Gabriel is disguised as Lombriz.]

Not. I proposed a plan to Mariquita, but as I have not heard from her, I suppose she was afraid to adopt it.

Gab. She said nothing about it to me.

Not. No, I enjoined secrecy; but I think this plan equally good.

Gab. As I understand it, when you enter Mariquita’s house, I am to present myself in this disguise.

Not. And I’ll marry you to her immediately.

Gab. As Mariquita will not be a party to the deception—

Not. And did not refuse to marry Lombriz—

Gab. And as she will then be my wife—

Not. It will be impossible for her to marry any one else.

Gab. Lombriz can go whistle for girl and money.

Not. And a very pretty point will be presented for judicial consideration.

Gab. Which of course Lombriz will try to use to his advantage.

Not. But as I’ll represent you and your charming bride, you need not fear.

Gab. Fear? If we lose, why, I don’t care, and I don’t believe Mariquita will either.

Not. But we won’t lose—that is, not while there is a dollar left to fight the case. But keep it dark.

[Exit Notary.]

[Enter Gandul and three Robbers.]

Gan. Excuse me—have I the honor to address Don Lombriz, the poor man’s friend and help?

Gab. You have. [Aside] No doubt this disguise is a great success.

Gan. [drawing his sword, fiercely] Then yield at once, base viper! miser! whelp!

[They fight. The three Robbers creep up from behind, throw Gabriel to the ground, and put him in a bag.]

[Gandul and Robbers pick up the bag containing Gabriel and carry it within the inn. Enter The Night-Watch L. U. E.]

[Exeunt Night-Watch R. U. E.

[Enter Mariquita, La Loba, and Villette, all three disguised as beggars.]

[Enter Lombriz, followed by Teresa, Jacinta, and Ester as beggars.]

[They force him into a bag and tie it.]

[La Loba, Mariquita, and Girls pick up the bag containing Lombriz and carry it within Mariquita’s house. Enter The Night-Watch.]

[Exeunt Night-Watch.

[Mariquita, La Loba, and Girls come out cautiously.]

[Exeunt U. R.

[Binks appears on balcony of the inn, wearing night-cap. He looks warm and dejected; has very hard pillow in his hand; looks at the stars.]

[Exit Binks. Chorus of Cats from the roofs of the house etc.]

[During chorus of cats, Binks reappears wrapped in cloak. At end of chorus, two Cats appear on fence; they scratch each other and begin to fight. Binks throws pillow at them.]

[While Binks is singing, enter Sapo and Robbers U. E. R. As he finishes the last note, they creep up from behind and throw a bag over his head.]

Binks Help! Murder!

[They roll over the stage, Binks calling “help! murder!,” until finally he is overpowered and put in a bag as the others.]

[They place him within the gate of the centre fence. Exeunt Sapo and Robbers.]

[Enter Mariquita, La Loba, Villette, Gandul, Sapo, and Chorus of Robbers from every entrance.]

[Binks, Lombriz, and Gabriel are brought on by the parties who captured them. General surprise.]

[They tie Gabriel and Binks together and lift up Lombriz.]

Gan. Take him up.

All Tenderly!

End of Act I

---

Act II

Scene.—Summit of mountain, with sea in distance. Large mass of rocks, practical runs, leading R. and L. In center, large chair hewn out of rock, under a tree. Rustic chairs R. and L., rustic table on L. At L. three large kettles swinging on cranes, a fagot-fire burning under each. As curtain rises, La Loba discovered alone, seated at table, pack of cards in her hand. During the following song, the day breaks and the mist gradually clears away.

[Enter Gandul.]

[During Gandul’s lines below, enter Sapo to join the song.]

Gan. Then you are determined?

Loba Irrevocably.

Sapo Suppose he don’t meet your views?

Loba He must meet my views. It’s the Fates’ decision, and I can’t go back on the Fates.

Gan. No; that would be a breach of confidence.

Sapo And would be unpardonable.

Loba We’ll give him a fair show; if he don’t suit, I’ll consult the Fates again. But go, you. Scour the country. Find him. I yearn to gaze on him.

[Exit La Loba.]

Gan. So do I.

Sapo We’ll make it pleasant for him, eh?

Gan. Don’t say a word.

[Exeunt Gandul and Sapo.

[Enter Binks coming down the run L., camera on his back, umbrella over his head. He gazes at the scenery in evident admiration.]

[Binks arranges his camera to take the view. When he gets his head under the cloth, a whistle is heard. He looks about, puts his head under again. Whistle is heard again. Enter cautiously Gandul, Sapo, and Robbers; they surround Binks.]

Binks Who are you?

[They dance around him, flourishing knives.]

[Enter Chorus of Gypsy Girls, dancing. Gandul and Sapo prod Binks with their knives and compel him to dance.]

[Enter La Loba, hurriedly.]

Loba O fluttering heart, flutter on—thy love has come! [She comes face to face with Binks. Looks long and disgustedly at him] And have I yearned for this?

Binks Beg pardon, mum. If your liver—

Gan. No levity!

Binks No liver, eh? Poor thing. How I pity her!

Loba I think I’ve seen your face before.

Binks I usually wear it in that position.

Gan. [on L.] She is the duchess.

Binks [starting to go R. encounters Sapo] Good morning!

Sapo And the bull-fighter’s sweetheart.

Binks [starting to go C. encounters La Loba] Good evening!

Loba And your affinity.

Binks Good gracious! Is this a picnic party or a convention of blooming idiots?

Gan. Neither.

Loba We were expecting you.

Binks Well, as I have come, what do you intend to do with me?

Loba We propose to marry you.

Binks What—all of you?

Gan. No, this is the unfortunate one.

Binks Why, we are not engaged. Besides, it’s so sudden. I appreciate the delicate honor, mum; but I must decline the blooming offer.

Loba Impossible!

Sapo Impossible! She must marry the first captive taken by our band.

Gan. It’s entered in the book of fate.

Binks Oh, you can fix that. Scratch the entry.

Loba [surveying him critically] I’d gladly do it; but I’d lose the stakes.

Binks But, mum, I can’t take the hurdles. I’m over-weighted. I’ve a blooming wife and kids at home!

Loba Such simple encumbrances don’t worry me.

Binks A double team is about all I can handle.

Gan. But you must. It’s in the cards—

Loba And we must make the best of the shuffle.

Binks Suppose I cut and run?

Loba No, you’ll stay and play your hand out. Leave us, friends; I would commune with the stranger alone.

[Exit Gandul, Sapo, and Chorus.]

Binks [gathering up his traps, about to go] We understand each other perfectly. You don’t like me, and I don’t like you; everything’s satisfactory. So I’ll be off.

Loba [running after him, pulling him back] What—and leave me to the mercy of outraged Fate? [Drawing dagger and toying with it tenderly] Oh, whisper you love me—if only but once!

Binks Misguided woman, desist! Think of Mrs. Binks.

Loba [fiercely] Mention her name but once again, and I’ll— but no; [Very tenderly] you are my affinity. Mrs. Binks will have to slide.

Binks Ha, ha, ha! Well, that’s good. I see you are not intimately acquainted with Mrs. Binks. Let her slide! Why, damn it, she can’t slide; she weighs two-fifty in the shade.

Loba Enough!

Binks It’s more than enough; it’s a matrimonial feast.

Loba [sadly, slowly] And I, heart-hungry, must be satisfied with a crumb?

Binks Don’t become historical— I mean hysterical. Try to love another. It’s hard after you’ve met me, I know; but try it, that’s a good girl. [Goes to her; fondles her]

Loba He calls me a good girl. Possibly, after years of practice, I may become accustomed to your style, and learn to love you; but now— [Throwing him aside] I despise you! Out of my sight! [Binks tries to steal off; she catches him. Tenderly] Would my oasis in the desert of life dry up, as it were?

Binks Beg pardon. I was going to see a man to wet up, as it were.

Loba Go! Take thy cringing, craven face away! [Tenderly] But no. Babble thy love; ’tis music to mine ear.

Binks And this to the man she called a crumb. Please define your position: Do you hate me, or do you love me?

Loba Both. I close my eyes and I see an Adonis; then, I love. I open them and I see you; then—

Binks Don’t mention it. Just keep your eyes closed for five minutes, and when you open them, you’ll see a grand transformation.

Loba But you’ll see it sooner. The next transformation will make us one.

Binks What—married? I draw the line right here. I won’t do it, and I won’t!

[La Loba draws her pistol and rushes at him very fiercely. Then, coaxingly—with pistol pointed at his head and left arm around his neck—starts off slowly.]

Loba Come, love, come. Time is fleeting.

Binks “Angels and ministers of grace defend us!” This marriage will be a failure.

[Exit La Loba and Binks R. U. E. in the same configuration.

[Enter Mariquita and Gabriel. Mariquita is still dressed as a robber. Gabriel is now dressed as a peasant girl.]

Mar. You say you wish to see me. Speak quickly—the dreaded Baldystopper has little time to waste on women’s words.

Gab. Do you know a lady named Donna Mariquita?

Mar. Why, yes, I am— I mean, I have heard of her.

Gab. Is she here?

Mar. No— that is, yes, I believe she’s locked up in the dungeon.

Gab. [aside] Why, she fabricates like a weather report. [Aloud] May I see her?

Mar. Certainly not!

Gab. Why?

Mar. Because— because we only allow visitors on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

Gab. I understand she’s quite homely.

Mar. On the contrary; she’s quite pretty.

Gab. I believe she squints.

Mar. Scandal-monger! Her eyes are as straight as mine.

Gab. Her hair, ’tis said, is not her own.

Mar. ’Tis false! That is—

Gab. And I’ve been told she walks pigeon-toed.

Mar. [walking up and down] Do you call that pigeon-toed?

Gab. Her lover, Gabriel, has renounced her. He says she’s a schemer and unworthy of the love of any good man.

Mar. ’Tis untrue. He’s too good, too manly, to deceive her.

Gab. Why, what do you know about her? You, a wicked cutthroat?

Mar. I’m not a cutthroat. I’m—

Gab. [stealing his arm around her waist and pulling off his wig] Mariquita, my sweetheart! And I—

Mar. Gabriel!

Mar. How did you know I was here?

Gab. Last night, I disguised myself as old Lombriz.

Mar. As old Lombriz? And you were—

Gab. Attacked by robbers.

Mar. Go on to the next chapter.

Gab. Why, what do you mean?

Mar. I mean I was one of the robbers!

Gab. You—! Why, it was given out this morning that you were abducted.

Mar. Nonsense. We abducted Lombriz.

Gab. THen you were with the robbers, who—

Mar. Exactly. Continue your narrative. Do the villagers believe that I was abducted?

Gab. Yes. A letter was received by the Alcalde, stating that just before the hour set for your marriage, you, by accident, discovered Lombriz in close consultation with two robbers named Gandul and Sapo.

Mar. Why, they are members of this band!

Gab. And, continued the letter, your unwilling ears and outraged feelings learned for the first time that Lombriz was a villain of the deepest dye.

Mar. What a fabrication!

Gab. The letter furthermore said that you immediately determined to reveal his true character to the Alcalde. You were about to leave the house, when Lombriz, knowing that exposure would be fatal to him, by the aid of those two robbers abducted and forced you to marry him.

Mar. Quite ingenious. But surely no one believes this story?

Gab. No one? Every one! Lombriz is cordially hated by all; consequently, everybody believes it.

Mar. Come, I’ll tell you my plan and introduce you to the band. They are going to crown a new king to-day. We’ll witness the ceremony, and then—

Gab. —We’ll return and ring the wedding bells.

Mar. Well, we’ll at least open negotiations with the bell-ringer.

[Exit Mariquita and Gabriel U. E. R.

[Enter Gandul leading the basses of the Chorus of Robbers. Each has a dark lantern and a kit of burglar tools, medals on breast, and dressed more neatly than the rest.]

[Enter Sapo leading the tenors of the Chorus of Robbers. They belong to the pick-pocket class.]

[Enter the altos of the Chorus of Gypsy Girls, neatly dressed, with fans in hands.]

[Enter the sopranos of the Chorus of Gypsy Girls. They are dressed as apprentice boys: apron, box-hat, etc.]

[Enter La Loba with Mariquita and Gabriel.]

[Enter Binks, dressed partly as robber-king, and pronouncedly English. He comes on in a cart, on each side of which are three dancing girls with tambourines and castanets.]

[Binks is about to be crowned. He jumps up and his head goes through the crown of the hat.]

[Exit Mariquita, Gabriel, and Chorus.]

Binks According to your ancient laws, as I understand it, a man aspiring to be your chief must be born a murderer, or become naturalized by welling in his fellow man’s gore.

Gan. That’s it exactly.

Binks Then I’m not eligible, and so—

Loba But we’ll make you eligible.

Binks How?

Loba Sapo, go you to our prisoner, Lombriz. Inform him I have selected him to prove the powers of our king-elect. Clothe him in a garb befitting the grand occasion, and tell him to prepare for the worst.

Sapo Suppose he should refuse to fight?

Loba Then tell him we’ll give the vultures a lunch to-morrow. If he be victorious, his reward shall be his liberty. Go!

[La Loba goes up stage. Exit Sapo R. U. E.]

Binks What’s that?

Loba I have selected an opponent for you.

Binks What shall I do with him?

Gan. Kill him!

Binks But—but, damn it, suppose he kills me?

Gan. Then we will know the office is uncongenial to your taste.

Binks That’s all right; but what shall I know?

Gan. That depends on your past conduct.

Binks What kind of a looking fellow is this Lombriz?

Gan. Oh, he’s rather small.

Binks Very small?

Gan. Yes, about so small.

Binks Is he strong, do you know?

Gan. No, he looks weak.

Binks Very weak?

Gan. Exceedingly weak.

Binks Well, bring him on, and I’ll astonish him. [Spars with imaginary opponent]

Loba [coming down] Gandul, don’t deceive the king-elect. Lombriz is not a weakling. Why, only this morning he threw Alphonso ten feet in the air—just for an appetizer, he said—and you know Alphonso weighs nearly two hundred pounds.

Binks Who did this?

Loba Lombriz.

Binks The gentleman I’m to slay?

Loba The same.

Binks Then I’ll not do it. ’Tisn’t fair. I’m outclassed. The fellow that juggles a man like a rubber ball is not the one I’m looking for.

[Enter Sapo.]

Sapo I’ve seen the prisoner Lombriz.

Binks Of course when you told him what a terror I am, he backed out.

Sapo On the contrary. He wanted to come immediately.

Binks Immediately—! Let’s call it a draw.

Loba Never! You must fight.

Binks Somebody catch me—I’m going to faint. [He falls in La Loba’s arms]

Loba Quick—bring water, wine, brandy, whisky, anything!

Binks [faintly] Never mind the water. Bring the rest.

[Gandul and Sapo run off and bear back bottles of brandy and whisky and a jug of wine. Binks drinks long and repeatedly of each of them.]

Loba Ah, he revives.

Binks I feel better now. Some more, please. [Same business] Lead me to my throne. —Stop! Bring the throne here. [They bring the rocky-chair. He seats himself] Give me my specter—I mean my billy. [Gandul hands him the sceptre] Wrap my royal robe around me. Some more. [Same business] I’m thirsting for my victim. [Rising, shouting] Bring him on!

Sapo He’ll be here shortly.

Binks Shortly won’t do. [Takes another drink] I want him now— now— now! [Studies contents of bottle] I feel like it now. I may not feel like it later.

Loba Come, rest awhile. You are weary.

Binks That’s it. The king is weary.

Gan. Very weary.

[Binks curls up on the throne. La Loba tucks his robe about him. He pokes his head out.]

Binks The king would cogitate. Leave me.

Gan. Come, we’ll let him sleep.

[Gandul, Sapo, and La Loba go off quietly 1st E. R.]

Binks Good night. Wake and call me early, for I’m going to be the Queen of the May.

[Binks begins to snore. The scene closes in, discovering roadway in mountain pass. Drums heard faintly, growing louder. Enter, 1st E. R., Captain San Giorgio with Chorus of Carabineers and Balthazar as their guide.]

Balt. We are not far away; the camp is just over that hill. I’ll remain here while you reconnoiter.

Capt. No! Forward, and lead the way!

Balt. But suppose I am killed?

Capt. If you are, I’ll see that your widow receives a pension. Forward march!

[They march off, Balthazar bringing up the rear. As he is about to exit L., he about-faces and with a long stride marches off in the opposite direction.

[Scene changes back to La Loba’s lair. Binks slowly awaking.]

Binks Where am I? Oh, my head! [Sits up and looks around] It must be a dream. [Shouts off. He jumps up] No, it’s reality!

[Shouts growing louder. Enter Gandul and Sapo, dragging Lombriz; and Chorus of Robbers. Gandul goes to Binks. Two men put blackboards such as used at races by pool-sellers, out R. and L. They prepare Binks and Lombriz for the fight. The Chorus divide. Business of Gandul and Sapo putting up odds on each, which are taken by members of Chorus. They make a ring; Binks and Lombriz try to escape; they are brought back; the crowd jostles them.]

[ As the Robbers, flourishing knives, force Binks and Lombriz together, Captain San Giorgio and Carabineers appear at back.]

[Binks and Lombriz rush into each other’s arms and embrace.]

[The Carabineers overpower the Robbers.]

Binks Now it’s my turn. I’ll torture them.

Capt. [coming to front] Where is Mariquita?

[Enter Mariquita.]

Loba Here she is.

Mar. [aside to La Loba] Now the thunderbolt will strike.

Loba Stand by me; I’ll get you out of the scrape.

Capt. Which of these cutthroats do you charge with your abduction?

Loba [aside to Mariquita] Lombriz.

Mar. [repeating] Lombriz.

[Lombriz attempts to speak. Gandul puts his hands over his mouth.]

Loba She’s right, captain.

Mar. Had it not been for Lombriz, I would not be here.

Gan. True.

Robbers True.

Sapo Very true.

Capt. Where is the villain?

All [pointing] There!

Lom. [breaking away and falling on his knees] Don’t believe them! I’m no robber. I’m a bank-cashier.

Capt. Enough! Guard him well. [Lombriz is placed among the soldiers]

Binks Glad to see you, Cap. Hope your blooming health is good. [Attempts to shake hands with the Captain, who refuses him]

Capt. Who is this cutthroat?

Robbers He is our captain.

Binks Ah, I say, a joke’s a joke, but this is going too far. These beastly blackguards caught me and tried to make me commit bigamy and murder both in the same day; you know you did.

Gan. Say, Cap, don’t weaken in the hour of distress.

Sapo Go down with the ship.

Binks [goes from one to another in mute appeal; finally, coming forward] Damn!

Capt. My orders are to take the men and free the women. We must be off.

[They place the men between two files of soldiers. Gabriel also. Mariquita attempts to stop him, but La Loba, in pantomime, tells her not to.]

End of Act II

---

Act III

Scene.—Corridor of prison. Cells arranged in semicircle across stage. Small grated window in each cell. Binks discovered in center cell, Gandul on R., Sapo on L., Robbers in others.

Binks Of all the blooming countries I have been in, this is the bloomingest.

Gan. That’s what I think. The climate is rather hard on my constitution.

Sapo Yes, a change is what we need. We are confined too much.

Gan. When do you think you’ll start?

Sapo Oh, I guess in a day or two, just as soon as they shoot Binks.

Binks Shoot me! What do you mean? They can’t shoot me! I’ll turn state’s evidence.

Gan. Oh, they’ll hardly trouble you with a trial. In cases of this kind, they always shoot the captain first and then try the others.

Binks And you call me captain?

Sapo We certainly do, Cap.

Binks Don’t “cap” me. I won’t have it. I repudiate you all.

Sapo That’s unkind, Cap. We won’t go back on you.

Gan. After you are shot, we’ll tell them that you were not our captain, and they’ll feel so sorry they’ll probably let us go.

Sapo That’s how we’ll work on their emotions.

Gan. It’s a great scheme, isn’t it?

Binks What, that one innocent man will suffer so that ninety-nine guilty ones shall escape? I don’t quite see the point.

Gan. No. You won’t live long enough to see it.

[Enter Jailer.]

Jailer Up, everyone, for breakfast. [Unlocks cells and shackles. All come out] Fall in! [All fall in except Binks.]

Binks Excuse me, your blooming highness. I have no appetite. What does a man peeping into eternity care about breakfast, especially a beastly jail breakfast?

Jailer Ah, well, my orders are to humor all prisoners the day before they are hanged or shot; and as you—

Binks Don’t say it, your blooming highness. You know you don’t mean it.

Jailer [brushing away a tear] Poor fellow! [To Robbers] Forward march!

[They march off L. in lock step. As Jailer is about to exit, Binks catches him by the coat-tail and draws him back.]

Binks One word, your blooming highness. I say, can’t you, for a large and luminous consideration, let me sneak out of this blasted beastly place? Now, say you can. [Imploringly]

Jailer Impossible.

Binks Picture the little Binkses crying papa, papa, and no papa there. Picture Mrs. Binks—Mrs. Matilda Jane Binks—alone in her loneliness, crying hubby, hubby, and no hubby there. Picture Mrs. Binks’s mother, my honored mother-in-law, waiting for me at three A. M., all primed and ready to go off, and waiting in vain. Ah, you soften. I see a tear in your eye. A little one, but still a tear.

Jailer [much overcome] I cannot—I cannot. It would cost me my life.

Binks On the other hand, it will cost me mine. You have no mother-in-law— Ah, another tear! [Attempts to steal the keys from Jailer’s hand; he faintly resists. Loud knock heard at door, upper left flat] I’m lost!

Jailer I’m saved!

[Jailer goes to door, opens slide. A dispatch is handed in. Jailer attempts to read it; cannot; finally hands it to Binks to read.]

Binks [reading] “To Jailer Saraste: The Alcalde directs me to state that, owing to the desperate nature of the prisoners under your charge, and fearing an outbreak, he will dispatch a company of carabineers to assume charge of the prison. The company, under charge of Captain San Giorgio, will arrive at the jail at one o’clock. Until that time, the Alcalde will hold you to strict accountability for the safe-keeping of each and every prisoner. By order of the Alcalde, Juan José Jeromo, Secretary to the Alcalde. Nota bene: Keep a vigilant eye on the captain of the band, as he is a desperate villain, and it is the Alcalde’s intention to shoot him at sunset.” [Drops letter] And they call me their captain!

Jailer Cheer up. It’s all in a lifetime.

Binks That’s what I object to. I wouldn’t mind it so much afterwards.

[Enter Gandul and Sapo.]

Gan. Another breakfast like that, and I’ll face the music of the musketry with pleasure.

Sapo You will at least get your fill, if it’s only cold lead.

Binks But cold victuals in the shape of lead are so indigestible.

Gan. It’s at least preferable to regulated starvation.

Sapo Which is so lingering.

Binks Everything seems to be lingering around here.

Jailer [to Gandul and Sapo] Come, into your cells.

Gan. Certainly, signor. [Jailer locks them in]

Jailer [to Binks] Don’t weaken. Face the music like a man.

[Exit Jailer.]

Binks I will. Future ages will come to gaze on the spot where Binks fell. There will be war, gruesome war, ghastly war, gory war, over this. I feel it in my bones. Ah, I see it now—the British legions marching in battle array. [Paces about, whistling “British Grenadiers”] Banners flying, bands playing, cannons booming, and through the din comes the battle-cry—“Remember Binks!” Ah, how proud I’ll be! How I’ll cut and slash, and charge and recharge! —No, I won’t: I’ll be twanging a golden harp on a moisty cloud.

[Exit Binks into his cell.

[Scene changes to courtyard of prison. Stone parapet, practical, for sentries to patrol. Door with sliding panel in upper left corner. On right of court, back of cells, raised five or six feet from the ground, small grated windows about six feet apart. First cell right, nearest footlights, practical with stone blocks filling hole large enough for men to pass through. As scene changes, clock strikes twelve.

[Enter Jailer.]

Jailer Twelve o’clock. In one hour the carabineers will be here and my trouble will be over.

[Drum heard in the distance. March heard faintly. Jailer goes to door, peers out.]

Jailer It’s the carabineers!

[Jailer opens the gate. Enter through gate La Loba disguised as a captain, Maraquita as lieutenant, Villette as sergeant, Teresa, Jacinta, Ester, and Chorus of Gypsy Girls as privates, Balthazar as a vivandière.]

[At end of chorus the carbines are placed against the wall at rear.]

Loba Lieutenant Pedroso, station sentinels on the ramparts.

Mar. Very well, signor Captain.

Jailer [saluting] Signor Captain, you came earlier than I expected.

Loba [aside] “Than he expected”—what does he mean? [Aloud] Yes, yes—I always move with military precision.

Jailer This beats military precision, as the Alcalde’s order stated you would arrive at one, and it’s just twelve.

Loba [aside] The Alcalde’s order! Then we are not any too soon. [Aloud] Lieutenant Pedroso!

Mar. Here, Cap.

Loba [aside to her] But little time remains for action. I will try to get the jailer safely out of the way, while you see Lombriz.

Mar. It’s my last hope.

Loba [to Jailer] I am ordered by the Alcalde to question the prisoners. Perhaps they have some confederates whom we may apprehend. Have you a list?

Jailer Yes, Signor Captain. [Hands slate with names on]

Loba [reading] Binks, Gandul, Sapo, Lombriz—Lombriz! Go you, jailer, with Corporal Oliveria [indicating Villette] and a squad, and bring this Lombriz here. I think I’ve seen him before; he’s a desperate villain.

[Exit marching Jailer, Villette, and four Girls.]

Loba [continuing, to Mariquita] I will retire and let you work upon his fears.

[Exit La Loba.]

Mar. After all my scheming, will I succeed? This day settles all. Will Lombriz get the fortune? He won’t get me; of that I am sure. The carabineers will be here within an hour, and then it will take but a few minutes for Lombriz to communicate with the Alcalde and explain all. The Alcalde says although Lombriz is a prisoner, he has not been proven guilty of any crime, and the law will protect his rights regarding the will. The only thing to do is to make him refuse to marry me; but how?—that’s the conundrum.

[Enter Lombriz with his four guards.]

Mar. [to Girl Guards] You may go. —On second thought, you’d better remain. Station yourselves there, there, there, and there. If this desperate villain makes a movement, shoot him down. —So you are Lombriz, the cutthroat.

Lom. I am Lombriz, but on my life I am no cutthroat. Let me tell my misfortunes.

Mar. Proceed.

Lom. Two nights since—

Mar. Oh, yes, same old thing. Don’t rehearse it.

Lom. As I live—

Mar. You won’t say that to-morrow. Our orders are to shoot you at sunset.

Lom. But I’m innocent—!

Mar. That’s what they all say. There is but one chance for you; it’s a slim one, but still a chance.

Lom. What is it?

Mar. You were to wed a young girl named Mariquita, were you not?

Lom. Yes, two days since.

Mar. I met her to-day, at the house of the Alcalde. She was very much exercised over the terrible position in which you are placed, and pleaded for your life.

Lom. Ah—she loves me!

Mar. Loves you? She hates you. But she don’t want to see you filled with lead.

Lom. Don’t talk that way! What did the Alcalde say?

Mar. He wouldn’t listen to her. He told her she ought to feel thankful that you are to be shot. But he finally said that if you would give up your claim to her hand, he would pardon you.

Lom. But I’ll lose both the girl and her money.

Mar. And if you don’t, you’ll lose yourself, the girl, and her money. It’s three against two. Take my advice and sign a refusal of the girl’s hand.

Lom. I can’t do it.

Mar. Very well. It’s nothing to me. My orders are to shoot you at sunset, and I’ll do it with extreme pleasure.

[Enter La Loba.]

Loba Come, Lieutenant, don’t remain talking to that villainous-looking fellow any longer.

Mar. He’s Lombriz.

Loba Oh, yes, the one we are to shoot at sunset. [Looking at sky] It will be sundown very soon.

Mar. [to Lombriz] Your decision?

Lom. I cannot.

Mar. Very well. Here, Corporal, take him to his cell. He’s to be shot at sunset.

[Lombriz pleads mutely. The guards are about to march him off.]

Lom. Hold—I’ll agree.

Mar. Sensible man.

[Mariquita produces a paper, which Lombriz signs.

[Enter Balthazar.]

Balt. Did you call?

Mar. Take this prisoner to the pardon ward.

Balt. [aside to Mariquita] I’ll lock him up in Juanquera’s wine-cellar, and we’ll be sure of him until to-morrow.

[The gate is unlocked. Exit Balthazar and Lombriz.]

Mar. Thank goodness he’s safely out of the way!

Loba I’m not rid of the old jailer yet. He’s at work on his third bottle. I don’t want the boys to know who we are until it is perfectly safe.

Mar. Shall I send for Gabriel?

Loba No, no sentiment until I fill up the old jailer.

[Enter one of the Girls with half a dozen bottles of wine.]

Loba These will settle him.

Mar. Gabriel, Gabriel, hope dawns at last!

[Exit Mariquita U. E. R.

[After exit, a slight tapping is heard in cell at right. It gradually grows louder, as if some one were trying to work through the wall. The two sentinels drop their carbines, sit down and go to sleep. Finally a portion of the wall falls out, and Binks pokes his head through. He is handed down head foremost. Gandul and Sapo follow. They come down on tiptoe.]

[After song the men of the chorus enter same as Binks and Gandul. They try the gate and find it locked. Sapo goes out and returns with a huge bunch of keys, but none of them will fit the door.]

Binks Boys, I’ve got an idea. Suppose you shy me over the wall and then I’ll run down and get a locksmith to come up and pick the lock.

Gan. Excellent idea—but I’d better go.

Binks As I originated the idea, you ought to let me carry it out.

[Enter Jailer, bottle in hand, very drunk.]

Jailer That’s the nicest military man I’ve ever met. Nothing stuck-up about him. [Sees the Robbers] Murder! Help! Thieves!

[The Robbers make a rush for the carbines, which they secure. The two sentries wake up and scream. Girls come rushing on. Tableau.]

[Girls kneel. Robbers cover them with carbines.]

[Binks ties up the Jailer, takes his keys, and is making for the door. The rest catch hold of the Girls and drag them towards the door.

[Enter La Loba.]

[The situation is reversed. Robbers kneel. Girls cover them with carbines.]

Loba Don’t you know us?

Robbers [likewise] You’re Bertha!, etc.

Girls [likewise] Yes, Bertha!, etc.

Loba Come, we have but a few minutes to escape.

[Loud rap at the door. All start. La Loba goes to the door and opens the slide.]

Not. [outside door] A message from the Alcalde.

[La Loba opens door and admits Notary. She takes the message, opens it, and reads.]

Loba “To the jailer Saraste—”

[They untie the Jailer and La Loba reads it to him.]

Loba “The Alcalde has received positive assurance that Donna Mariquita Coelo was not abducted by the prisoners under your charge; so he orders that you free them at once. Juan José Jeromo.”

All Huzzah!

Binks Tiger!

[Another rap at the door. Gate is opened. Enter Balthazar.]

Balt. I’ve the old fossil securely locked in the wine-cellar. He was tasting seven different kinds of wine all at once, and by this time he’s as full as a judge.

Mari. In that case, I’ll go home and demand that my ancient bridegroom present himself immediately for my wedding. And as he won’t be there— well, I can’t be expected to postpone the ceremony for such a trifle.

Gab. And I—?

Mari. Will be the happy man.

All Huzzah!

Binks Tiger! Say, while you’re in that position, let me take a group picture. [Business of taking a photograph] I want to show them at home the band of which I’ve the honor to be king.

Loba But you are not! You failed to pass the necessary examination, and I have since discovered that the Fates wanted me to marry—

Sapo Whom?

Loba Our very dear friend, Gandul.

Sapo Very well. But I want the first vacancy.

Binks And so this king business is over. [To Gandul] And you are to be king of the band. Captain, I charge thee fling away ambition. By that sin fell the Mugwumps. My camera and my integrity to Mrs. Binks is all I dare call my own. Had I been less a man, I would now be a blooming bigamist. Farewell.

Curtain